Painter, oh my I never thought of alcohol being the OW. Yes I agree about an inpatient rehab center. He just went thru a rehab program in 10/2015. But I don't think 28 days are quite enough.
I just found out H tried to increase credit limit on credit card and get personal loan for $1000. To which both were denied as this addiction has killed our credit. Then that means H won't be able to get his own place. Blessing in disguise???
wife of an addict M 39 H 39 D18 D 16 Together 19 M17
Well H has been out drinking again tonight. He started to text me about his basketball team winning. I responded politely to him. I told H yes it was a good win for your team. I left it at that. Now H is drinking and drinking and I can tell he is drunk by his messages.
H sends this message to me "Just so you know. Can't take a phone call right now. watching the game with a couple of friends but there is a female that I have been talking to that has been a good emotional connection to me. Just thought you should know I didn't respond as I didn't know how to H blew up my phone wanting a response. I finally sent back "Sorry that it took me a moment to respond. I was processing this. I was worried but I'm glad you are safe."
He has been going on and on. I don't know what to do. Afraid H will come home and be angry because I'm not playing into his mess emotions or whatever.
I'm trying hard to detach but why do they do this.
wife of an addict M 39 H 39 D18 D 16 Together 19 M17
H has still been blowing up my phone. I have not responded again. I hope that is the right thing to do. It seems to me that H is trying to push my buttons as now he is asking me do you want to meet her. I have not responded to that either. It's like H is trying to make me mad at him so he doesn't feel guilty.
Or am I WAY off about H????
wife of an addict M 39 H 39 D18 D 16 Together 19 M17
Well I think I got some sleep but here only 4 hrs later I'm awake. I woke and then my mind started wandering and thinking bad things. I turned to my high power. I stopped and breathed and then said a little prayer to protect my thoughts. I am no longer going down that thought path/line of thinking.
Still so dumbfounded about supposed EA that H dropped last night. I want to believe him, but he was drinking and being an alcoholic I can only believe 50% of what he says. It was like he was just trying to push my buttons to get upset hurt angry. I didn't and I think that upset H.
I don't know what to do. Should I bring up anything about his messages? Should I let them lie? Will bringing them up now in the light of a new day be beneficial or detrimental???
wife of an addict M 39 H 39 D18 D 16 Together 19 M17
Focus on you TabD. Do not think about what he's thinking, do not think about what he's doing. Just be present in your head. He cannot hurt you if you don't let him.
If he hurts you physically, then get him locked up.
I eat soup when i have no appetite, as I don't have to chew, just swallow. You also can't sleep on an empty stomach so make sure that you always have good nutrition on hand. Also, banana's help one to sleep better. You can do it! You will survive this!
Just cos things are going right, doesn't mean that they were always wrong.
Referring to your earlier posts, he wants your attention. He is as addicted to you as you are to him. When you lose your addiction, he might lose it too. He is also looking for an excuse to continue hurting you - someone to blame for the pain he is causing. Don't give him that power.
Just cos things are going right, doesn't mean that they were always wrong.
I think it's time for some healthy detachment. I would even consider turning the phone off when he's out carousing. If necessary let him know that you will be doing this as you need to care for yourself and what he did was akin to emotional abuse last night. Is there a support group locally for family of addicts?
M 10yrs T 13yrs BD #1Oct 2015-PA between WAH and COW BD #2 April 2016-WH resumed PA, she broke it off Jan 2 2017 WH says he wants divorce April '17-Letting go 2018 D busted DD8, DS6, DS3
Cadet, I do remember you stating that do not believe ANYTHING and only partly of what he does. I am glad you reminded me of that. I am seeing my Coach today. I am hoping she give me some goals. I made a small list last week but haven't even looked at it since then.
wife of an addict M 39 H 39 D18 D 16 Together 19 M17
