Vise to answer your question first before i update...
I have not really thought about just getting the D. I was going to comment on your thread about this but i will do it here. I kind of feel that you are putting entirely too much emphasis on the fact that you are still legally married. Your W does not think this way. You keep mentioning that your feelings are hurt when you are not invited to things with her family or stuff she is doing. She is not emotionally married to you anymore it is just a piece of paper. The WAS feel that the conversation about splitting or separating freed them.
Yes they will treat friends and anyone else better than you. it is because they feel no pressure from them and they are not a reminder of what they are doing. Yes they will still feel you are ok to do things with the family but they are doing that for the kids and to ease the feelings they get of guilt at times.
So, with that in mind I never considered the filing part. In reality i dont want that and i know that being legally separated frees her to do what ever she wants anyway in her mind. therefore, if i ever just want to move on i will start D or not.
So update time...
We all know that i asked W if there was interest to go out with me. She responded that she needed to process this. Then W got sick this weekend. Saw her yesterday and she still looked in bad shape. So i have had no answer. Dont know if she plans on responding yes or no, or at all.
I had a DB coach call a day or two after the question was asked. Coach felt that there was no problem asking as we discussed this a few months earlier. We discussed what I do with a no answer or not getting an answer.
he did think that her response was a positive.
I was asked if she said no or didnt answer what would the old me do? I said I would probably pull away and not really engage her or just be more quiet around her. He suggested i 180 that. Dont change the interaction we have at all. She may very well be really struggling with what to think. If i show the old me when i dont get an answer I like or quick enough then she was justified.
In the end the answer will definitely have an impact but I need to continue being me and moving forward. So if she maybe not quite ready yet then there may be a chance down the road. I also informed him that I was also very curious that if i got a no or non response if i would let go more. so we are seeing how that plays out as well.
Anyway, I will keep everyone up to date.
M 37 W 34
T 12 M 8 D 7 S 4
Need break 4/12/15 W no ring 7/7/15
Separate room 4/12/15 Separate living suggested 8/15 W moved out 11/1/15
