Thank you so much for posting! I really appreciate your kind words,
I have been thinking about this a lot. Even if husband was to back down and want reconciliation, I am 99% sure I would not reconcile.
The truth is, at this point I am not trying to save my marriage anymore. I love my husband and don't want to see him suffer, but I would not want to be with someone that was capable of leaving me the way he did. Plus it would be hard to believe that there was no other woman.... Which for me has always been a non negotiable.
I have seen too many people come back on these boards years later because their spouse did the same thing again. I do not ever want to go through this again. Of course, my next partner MIGHT be capable of doing something like this. But I know for sure that my husband IS capable of this.
I am pretty sure I would rather be alone for the rest of my life, then recommit with my husband. Even if he was remourseful and had a change of heart and said he was willing to work on marriage. This isn't likely to happen anyway. I used to want so badly for this and now I don't care.
I know that my feelings on this matter go against the DB Philosophy. I know people can argue that I am thinking just like a WAS. But I don't believe that at all. Fidelity and commitment are clearly defined promises in a marriage. It's what marriage is all about.
I never broke any promises...I just nagged and had anxieties
