WAW moved out, spewing anger, trying to detach

[SH_]

Good morning. I slept well, and feel tired this morning but I am excited. I am looking forward to a good day and ended yesterday on a great note.
This is a moment that I am living in as I feel peace and joy.

Ralph,
Your comment that there is a fantasy really makes sense. Alas I know you are right that even without a known EA/PA that my WAW is chasing a fantasy. I believe it is a fantasy that she perceives due to her family living a life she wishes she had although she wants to stay ignorant to any of the facts below the surface. I think her fantasy is being blurred with going through the D proceedings and much of her anger stems from that. But I know that none of this can continue to play in my mind, because it does not help me be who I need to be. I have to stop with the ongoing desire to understand why this is happening. My heart knows this, my mind tries to wander. Thank you for flicking me in the ear and reminding me that I am not the only one in the sitch where the WAS is not necessarily involved with another person.

Jimkao,
Hang in there my friend. Your sitch with so many young ones is a challenging one and her not really giving you sound reasons is a tough thing. You are doing great all things considered. Let me know how your last coaching session goes if you follow up on it. I believe I will as I know Dbing is not just to save a MR, but it is to save us individually.

Vise,
I think sandi is right. The hardened heart is certainly what we are dealing with. Each interaction I see it more and more. My Bishop at church used the exact term and he is the only person I am aware of that has spoken with both of us and heard 2 sides of the story. I am learning how to not react in her presence and am praying daily that her heart may be softened so we can speak as mature adults. Until then, we must become better persons ourselves.

CWOL,

My friend. You have been a great support checking in regularly with me. You have a truly difficult sitch and my heart breaks knowing the toll it takes on you. Divorce laws really need to be re evaluated as they are so one sided in many places, and this makes no sense. I am fortunate that my state keeps it even. Funny thing is that she is still finding ways to kick and scream and claim she is getting screwed. I see why D is so messy. When there is such a victim mentality, there is going to be a fight, because no rationale will ever add up for the one with the victim mind frame. She claims she is divorcing me because I made her a victim to who I am, she left my family, because she was a victim in it, she is a victim because d17 does not want to live with her and on and on it goes.
But I digress.

Phoebe,
Your support is my saving grace each day. No need to apologize for missing a previous post and offering comfort. Just the opportunity to read your thread and see any post on mine has provided me strength each day. God works in mysterious ways, and meeting you via this forum is certainly an answer to my prayer. Your words of wisdom, support and the 2x4's that you provide all help keep my perspective. This is so valuable for me and words typed can not thank you enough. I know you will be there each day to lift my spirits simply with your presence in my and your threads here in this forum.
I am working to figure a plan to take my d's away for a short time where we can just be together and away. Away time is really a needed thing.
Thank you Phoebe for all that you have done for me in your support.

I will provide some journaling for the latter half of yesterday and my day today later this evening as I must get going and get this day started.

Have a wonderful day each of you that read this and those that have shared support for me. Be sure to GAL today if even just a little. You will thank yourselves for it.