Does my story belong here now?

[someguy1233]

My wife emailed me again for the contact information for the tenant that is renting a property we own. I told her that we still hadn't talked about what's going to happen since the last time she sent that request. She agreed to talk tonight and said she wasn't sure what was going to happen but she needed space and somewhere else to live. She said she wasn't running out to file papers.

I wasn't sure how the talk was going to go. In the back of my mind I told myself I needed to just end it.

We spoke briefly about where we would each live and then it turned into a disagreement about who would pay for daycare for the kids if we separated our finances. I spoke calmly but she became angry and started to spin my words and the situation. It was the same tactic she's used against me during every disagreement over the years. I felt like my feelings and words were being completely disregarded. She also made threats such as, "oh! I guess my mom was right! You are going to make this ugly!"

It was right about that moment that something clicked. I realized that this behavior of hers has always been there. I've always been made to feel disregarded, unheard, and the bad guy. I hate to say it, but I don't know if that behavior would ever change, no matter how much I wish it could. I can't keep being treated this way.

I told her I was done. I said I wanted to hire a mediator and file.

She didn't even seem surprised. We spoke further about shared custody, living arrangements, and splitting assets. We ended up coming to agreements on almost everything.

She's not doing well. She's thin. She's emotional. She's hurting. But there's nothing I can do for her... I've tried for all these years.

I've been mostly calm with little emotion the last few weeks. It just came rushing back. I look at this house, the pictures of the kids, the decorations... everything is a reminder of a life I tried so hard to build. I can't stop crying. I suddenly feel alone.

I feel like somehow she was still my unfaithful rock... even over the last couple weeks. That strength walked out the door with her.

God I hope I'm doing the right thing. Please.