I am very thankful for the responses I am getting as they are very helpful to me.
Cadet, I did read over the links you sent me, and plan to implement a lot of what I have learned.
SadHub, I totally agree that I need to focus on myself now, but for me that is so hard. I know it sounds pathetic, but he was all I had. I am in a new city because we moved here together a little over a year ago. I don't have any family near me, and haven't made many friends yet, so it's been so hard because I am alone ALL THE TIME.
SadSara, you sound like a very strong individual that has learned from their situation. I admire that and hope that I can become strong in that manner myself. I've actually debated contacted the other woman's parents myself, the other woman was actually a close friend so it was like a double betrayal for me, and both my H and the OW never admitted to anything, and I feel like they got away with things without consequences. I know it is not my job to make them face consequences, but it just adds to my pain knowing they got away with so much.
I loved the DR book. It has helped me so much, and I plan to reread it so I can focus on strategies that will help my situation specifically. I've hired a coach and will be having my second session with her tomorrow. Despite that, I do have set backs and I do things that I KNOW are pushing him away more and making him resent me even more. I'm honestly worried that at this point if I don't accept it, then it'll be emotionally unhealthy for me. He has given me the paperwork and is demanding I return it signed to him by Monday. I am going to write out the last resort letter with my coach tomorrow, and I plan to deliver it to him with the divorce papers. Would you guys advise that I do it that way? Or should I give him the last resort letter, and then give the divorce papers a few days later? I'm still being hopeful, but at the same time trying to move on with my life. I know miracles can happen, and that's exactly what I would need at this point to make this marriage survive.
