WAW moved out, spewing anger, trying to detach

[Phoebe]

SadHub, I am so sorry that I missed your post on Friday night! We were typing at the same time, and I was writing about your earlier post. I just caught a reference to the odd texts and went back to see what they were about and came across our cross-posts. Again, I am so sorry that I didn't offer you any words of comfort when you really needed them.

Those waves of unexplained emotion just come out of the blue. I had my own wave knock me flat last Thursday. It was the same thing. I was just feeling a little off, and then suddenly I was back into total breakdown mode, the whole 9 yards. There really is no fighting it off, and fighting it doesn't help anyway. Stuffing a cork in it just makes the next explosion bigger. I just took the stupid Xanax and let the wave wash over me, as there is no stopping it once it starts.

The only way out is through. Or "If you're going through he11, keep going!"

Anyway, I know that things are off kilter for you. Your life has been turned upside down. You have to see the source of your pain all the time, so you can't ever really escape it. I can totally understand why you are eager to have your WAW just leave already!!!

You have made so much progress and you are doing great. Just expect that you will be hit by these waves sometimes, and that they don't necessarily have an obvious source. Just let them come and they will pass and become less frequent, like ripples on water. In the beginning, the ripples are just more like tsunamis! Hold on to something (a pencil?!) and let them roar on through. Over time, they will get smaller and less frequent. Take the meds for the tsunamis, though.

I hope that you have a good day today. I'll check in on you later tonight.