I wouldn't follow up agreeing to counseling in a few days. The point is to make the initial conversation one-sided so that you can gather information and process it rather than engaging or starting any kind of argument.

Here's the point, if you say "Why do you want to go to counseling, what are you trying to achieve?"

She could say "I want you to find closure so we can part as friends" in which case there is no need to go to counseling.

She could say "I'm very sorry for what I did. I would like to apologize, make amends and find a way forward". In that case you may agree to counseling.

She could say "I don't like how we're getting along right now and I'd like that to be better" which is basically looking for a way to cake-eat in which case you should refuse counseling until OM is gone.

Acc

Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced
M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11
Start Reconcile: 8/15/11
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced)
In a New Relationship: 3/2015