Too little too late?

[Ralph88]

She wanted to come there, see what's going on, temp check you and toss some affection around cause she's feeling the loss of both you and the family which is cake eating. You let it, but if you were really detached and we're moving on you would not have, in fact at that hour, you would have just said, drop the stuff outside or I'll come to your car and get it. My WW would do a lot of that early on, but even though I may have been cold and/or meanish, I stopped all that.

[CRW]

Ralph, did that yield positive results?

[CRW]

I will say this, when she was getting ready to leave, I felt her kind of look at me to gauge if i wanted her to stay, I told her to have a good night and I would talk to her later.

[CRW]

I've been playing it cool with her so far today, responding to question about the kids, but keeping it professional and brief.

So is the general consensus that I shouldn't let her come in my house?

[Ralph88]

I've had no positive results with anything, but it was pure cake eating, over and over coupled with manipulation. She wants to be friends, you know hang out with the kids together once in a while so a family dinner.. Down the road maybe, but not with OM in picture. Sorry, not my thing.. We had that, it was called a M and a family... She shredded it

[otw]

Ralph
I get a feeling you are pretty angry right now. I know what you are saying though about the cake eating. Kind of why I am where I am with my situation.

I know we get some really one way advise here. But I take each situation as its own. If I had knowledge about OM in my case there would be no talks at all.

[CRW]

So, the past 24 hours have been eventful.

Yesterday morning I found out I have a torn MCL. Makes GAL much more difficult!

Then took S15 to the dentist in the afternoon. Found out he has 16 cavities! Immediately he blamed it on WAW for not getting him to the dentist in time. I told him that was crap and he needed to brush his damn teeth. Well, that lead into a huge conversation about how he can’t stand his mom and she does this and she does that and never has time for him. S15 has had some issues with telling the truth, so I suspected some of what he said was valid, and some wasn’t.

So I called WAW and basically told her what S15 told me, in a very calm non- accusatory manner. It went fairly well, but didn’t seem like she was willing to be very accountable for her part. Anyway, after the conversation was over, she thanked me for sharing that with her.

Later on she sent me this text:

‘Jaden has told me many things tonight and the bottom line is he feels he can do more stuff when with anyone else. He feels you let him go to more things with his friends and don't ask questions. He said he doesn't have as many chores and you don't harp on him to do anything. This is my house and i have rules. He is a 15 year old teenager who has proven he can't always be trusted. He told me i am the reason he gets in trouble at school, I'm the reason he has an attitude and gets frustrated easily. He is taking no responsibility for his actions.
I want the best for him. His grades are terrible. I don't know what to do.’

That end line was the first time in many months she has let herself be vulnerable to me in a long time.

So late last night I responded with, ‘What do you think we should do?’

This morning she asked me if I would have time to talk today. I am a little nervous about the conversation. I have no idea what her motives are. Call is coming up here in 10 minutes.

Any thoughts?

[CRW]

Couldn't have been less eventful. Just telling me how S15 was not listening again and stuff. Not sure why we needed some scheduled phone call for that, when a text would have done.

[CRW]

The wheels came off this weekend.

At what point do you say enough is enough?

[CRW]

Don't mistaken my calling rather then texting for me "loving" you. For that matter define love, i don't think love is me wanting to vomit when i have to be around you or talk to you......and as for me coming to the condo wed night, i did that because i don't want you any where near my house. I call not because i want to talk to you, it is easier when I'm driving and have something important to say about the kids, but point taken no more phone calls because it sends the wrong message. You thoughts of love are delusional as [censored], please seek help because I'm so over you, i don't know how to make it any clearer. This will be the last time i say this, i do NOT love you in any way, not one piece of my body wants anything to do with you. Don't EVER message me again unless it has something to do with the kids, or i will file harassment charges against you. Consider yourself warned.