Need some help from the DB community! Crunch Time!

[cbtdad]

Thanks Roist
It is tough being in this situation again. I'm definitely to blame for part of it. But I will not take all the blame for it this time. I started IC today which was really good.
I told her my goals are to learn how to trust again, stop being verbally and emotional abuvise, and learning to let go and understanding that I can only control my actions.
She brought up a very good point. Which is i haven't been able to trust again because W never took ownership of her actions the first time. You can't forgive someone who won't take responsibility.
We are working on understanding that just because you have a feeling doesn't mean you have to act on it.
I can't control my feelings but I can control my actions

My short term goals are to learn how to control what I can and let go of what I can't. Also, to really watch my tone and how talk to wife and son. I'm also going to begin to do more individual things. So more GAL!!
In the end the IC said that I need to focus on me for the next couple months
If they changes the dynamic of the marriage and I'm happy then great
If not then I have to make a decision and if that decision is to let her go so I can be happy then that's what I need to do