I can only comment on what you have told us so far and her response "im just flirting.." to me is way out of line. If she wants to be in the marriage as she says then its inappropriate to be flirting sexually with other men.
If you are still trying to work for the M i guess you cant get hung up on it either. You made your stance and now you just need to be the best YOU you can be as you said. You will know her through her actions.
Me31 W31 M11yrs S6yrs 23Mar16-BD 9Apr16-W admitted EA w boss. 27Jun16-W Changed job and promised NC w OM. 14Jul16-Continued contact w OM.Start of Separation. 24May17-Divorced.