I didn't mean to offend. And yeah, my coach has a clearer picture of the situation than I have portrayed here.
My main point was that not one size fits all.
And you are right, I have greatly valued the input from those on the boards here. I was asked about coaching and responded with an example. I should not have said 'most here'. My point was that my coach pointed something out that really helped me.
She is definitely not ready to work on the marriage. No way. I put the chances at 5% for success, but I will take that 5%.
Me: 38 y/o W: 38 y/o Together: 10 yrs Married: 7 yrs S1, D3, S15(hers previous, I adopted May'15) WBD: Sep '15 W's EA confirmed Oct'15 W Filed Dec '15 Personal awakening Mar'16