Found out 12 Hours ago. What now?

[LiM]

So, what usually makes them care? When does the fog lift? What happens in a WW to make them in that spot again? If ever?

A's almost never last. Once they realize the grass isn't greener on the other side and that the OM is not the person they thought they were, the A will die. The WW almost never chooses someone that is "better." I mean, this guy left his W and kids. Is that the kind of person she really wants to be with? Probably not. Its all a fantasy and eventually that fantasy world will come crashing down around her.
She's also got to experience some sort of loss. Typically, that loss is realizing that she has lost you and her family. You've got to start living your life so that she will she what she has lost. In order to do that, you have to move on. Dump her. Emotionally divorce her in your mind. But you must be genuine in this. If you aren't, if she thinks you are only doing it to win her back, she will smell it a mile away.
You deserve better than this. Once you own that reality and start living your life in a way where you truly believe that, she will begin to see what she has lost.