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Originally Posted By: 198127
So what do I do. She's "staying with a friend for the week" Who knows, when she is coming back etc.


Well...what are your goals?

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Originally Posted By: darknes
Originally Posted By: 198127
So what do I do. She's "staying with a friend for the week" Who knows, when she is coming back etc.


Well...what are your goals?


break up/end their relationship. Reconcile with my wife

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Those aren't things you can control. You can't break them up and you can't make her want to be committed to your M. You can go to the gym, wear nice clothes, maybe draw her back, no guarantees. Do it for you, if she comes back it's a bonus. Be a better you.


Ralph88
Me 40s W 30s, D5 D3 , M7 T9
2013 B drop 1, EA found
2016 B drop 2, EA/PA?
2/16 Physical Seperation
2/16 I filed for D
4/16 PA Confirmed
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Originally Posted By: Ralph88
Those aren't things you can control. You can't break them up and you can't make her want to be committed to your M. You can go to the gym, wear nice clothes, maybe draw her back, no guarantees. Do it for you, if she comes back it's a bonus. Be a better you.


I do all those things already.

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Well more goals then. Meet new people, go to church, take a class, read a book, learn to cook somethings, go fishing, go shooting, go to IC, take a communication class, take a swim class, go to library and get some learn how books teach yourself something new, take a paint and wine class... Plan a big event for yourself a trip or something.. Reconnect with some old friends.. Volunteer at a soup kitchen..


Ralph88
Me 40s W 30s, D5 D3 , M7 T9
2013 B drop 1, EA found
2016 B drop 2, EA/PA?
2/16 Physical Seperation
2/16 I filed for D
4/16 PA Confirmed
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Originally Posted By: 198127
Originally Posted By: darknes
Originally Posted By: 198127
So what do I do. She's "staying with a friend for the week" Who knows, when she is coming back etc.


Well...what are your goals?


break up/end their relationship. Reconcile with my wife


You've already confronted and exposed. Not much left to do on that front. Any more you do will only drive them together.

What are your goals for you?

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198127 Offline OP
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confirmed with other wife. WW is staying with OM in cheap motel---despite telling her mom she was going to spend the week with her girlfriend.

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and she took my car there! Exposure didnt do anything. They are living their own life now.

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and she called her mom to lie to her again and tell her she wasn't at his hotel or have dinner with him. Her mom believes her lies now.

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How can you stop focusing on her? Stop trying to "rally" her family to get her to stop. That's only going to galvanize her and OM together.

How can you turn your focus on you? How can you use this gift of time?

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