New here need support

[collin]

Poschan, i'm not trying to hijack your thread here..just Sandi said something that I can relate to 100%.

I think I've previously talked about how some guys acted more like a hired hand instead of the man in the house, catering to the W's every whim. Cleaning everything, doing all the cooking, the laundry, on & on. That is not what wins the heart of a woman. She isn't attracted to a housekeeper and cook! She wants a man. If he has helped in creating a spoiled brat, then he has a very bad situation on his hands. And if he has always done everything b/c she refused to do.............same thing, a spoiled brat. Know what to do? You unspoil her! and you don't tolerate her brattiness. Boundaries are useful here, too.

My W always complained that I didn't show her I loved her. Simple male mind here, I thought that as long as I did stuff for her, like doing laundry, taking care of dogs, doing this, doing that, I was showing her I loved her. In reality, I think I was doing the opposite. I was using that as showing her love and not showing her love the way I should've been. I really need to look into boundaries though. Because I think that when she calls my name from the bedroom, when I'm in the living room, to turn her light off is not having very good boundaries. But, what do you do when the boundaries make her mad?

I apologize Poschan for jumping on your thread like this. I just read that and it really hit home.