Yuck. Just sending him that admin email makes me feel gross. Like I need to take a shower again.

Is repulsion a form of detachment, because I think that's what I'm feeling right now. Partly it's because, in looking back at my thread to see when I last met with H, I was reminded of how awful that last meeting really was and how badly I fell apart afterward.

Is there anyone out there whose spouse has completely dropped out of contact who can share their thoughts? Is my dreading contact normal? My disgust?

I think it's time for me to watch a DVD. Something to help me shake off this feeling.

H: 44, Me: 45
Married: 20 y Together: 25 y
no kids
Walk away: 12/15
Asked for temp separation 12/25/15
PA confirmed 3/16 (apparently neither the first, nor the last PA he has had)
H filed for D 5/16