What should I be doing? (2)

[cbtdad]

"dressing better, keeping the MB neat and tidy, always wearing cologne and she has been noticing"

This has to be for you!!!!
You are trying quick fixes thinking that she will just snap out of it.
Unfortunately it's very unlikely to happen like that. It has to play its course. I learned the hard way. I constantly would think, "oh this is it. She done with the OM"
Only to be right back where you are feeling again.
You sound a lot like me when it comes to control.
This is something you can't control. The sooner you understand that, the sooner this will get a little easier to understand
Let's use the snooping as example.
Because I was a pro at that and still am
It's something I struggle with all the time
But let's be honest to ourselves. Regardless of what we find, is it gonna change the present situation right away? Can we control it?
No! But we can control whether we snoop or not.

I had a great example tonight of understanding where I am again
I got home from work and the neighbors came to join us.
They were talking how relaxed I was and also how relaxed I was last night
I thought to myself, wow you know what I have been relaxed lately.
You know why?
Because I started reading DB again and it reminded me that this about me and that's all I can control

Just remember this is a marathon not a sprint! There are no immediate results!