We talked again last night going over how to tell the kids. Didn't go well again. She wanted to just say her thoughts off the top of her head and I think it should be written down so nothing is forgotten or said wrong. She got extremely angry saying I was trying to control the situation. I told her I was trying to work with her and trying to discuss it with her and figure out a happy medium for both of us.
Her anger scared me a bit to be honest.
I stayed as calm as I could trying to keep her in the conversation and show that I was trying to compromise and work through it together. She stayed pretty upset throughout the conversation but we seemed to finally have something ready for tomorrow
You can't control how she interacts with the kids. Honestly this paragraph DOES come across as very controlling. (I'm pointing it out because I care, NOT to be critical) Please please take a step back and realize that the more you try and script a conversation the more it's just going to go off track. Yes, have an idea of what you want to say but some people do better with winging it and that's ok!
Again NOT trying to be critical but the day after day of your W meeting with you to discuss a script sounds more like a student bringing a teacher a term paper to grade and the teacher continously giving it back saying "not good enough yet".
I understand you are scared and don't want this 'milestone' to happen but it's going to so try to let it happen with the least amount off stress to you & the kids.
BTW, it's probably not helping your cause to be openly critical of your W right now.
Now next topic, what do you have planned for yourself this weekend?
Me: 35 husband:39 Sons 16 and 11 from my first marriage Twins 5 (boy/girl) Daughter 3 Affair bomb 2/27/14 He moved in with ow 3/13/14 OW kicked him out 6/15/14 4/2016 he seeks help for sexual addiction
