Sotto, I notice your H's statement was all about him still... It reminded me of an episode with H:

Years and years ago, I had arranged a big surprise birthday party for H. I planned it for weeks.

Driving to the restaurant where he thought we were going to have a small family dinner (MIL and the kids were in the back seat), he lit into me because I hadn't gotten him a cake and I knew how important that was to him. I was taken aback because I didn't know that a cake was so important, but just smiled and said, 'How do you know I didn't get you a cake? It's not even dinner yet.' He said he knew there wasn't one in the fridge at home. (A friend had taken a huge cake - H's favorite - to the restaurant earlier in the day.) He kept chewing me out the entire drive, and MIL and the kids sat dumbstruck in the back seat.

Eventually, after greetings and surprise reunions with people he hadn't seen in years, and dinner, the cake was carried out. He looked at me and said quietly, 'Boy, do I feel stupid.'
It was still all about him. I never got an apology or anything else.

M 16 yrs, WH62, P54
3 adult blended kids
EA 11/13, BD1 6/14
PA fall 14, BD2 2/15
Piecing 2015, BD3 12/15
Separated 4/16
WH moved OW in 5/16
Divorced 6/15/17