Thinking back over the past 2 months or so its seems like she pulled away more. I've said before she is a very determined person. Gets her mind set on something and wants to follow through. I'm second guessing my approach with her. Patience right?
This is my W to a fault. Being determined and following through on things is generally a good trait to have. But when it becomes the primary driving factor at the expense of logic, then there is a problem. And when there is an OM, there is NO logic. Common sense goes out the window. My W started her A and then became set on S. We probably did need to S and have a cooling off period but because she was in the fog of the A, she made some very poor choices. She rented a 3 bedroom house with a 1 year lease and filled it full of new furniture for her and our daughters. But my daughters have stayed with me through this whole ordeal. There were probably a lot of ways she could have S that wouldn't have had as many financial repercussions.
Dont second guess yourself. IF she is still involved in the A, there is no hope and you can't truly evaluate the effect your changes are having. She'd got to come out of the fog and the A has to stop before that can happen. If you are not seeing changes in her, you should probably assume the A is still active. I didn't see changes in my W and it was because the A was still active and I didn't know it. One week after the A was exposed to OM's W, EVERYTHING started to change. Stay the course. Keep doing what you are doing. The process works.
Me: 48 y/o W: 47 y/o Together: > 20 yrs BD: Dec '15, then S 2nd BD: Mar '16, then I filed for D April '16: started piecing
