Michelle Weiner-Dais has a video on Youtube, "Advice on What to Say or Not Say to the Kids." In the video she says that it's best that you do tell the children if one of the parents wants the divorce and the other doesn't. She says that if you don't tell them, they'll still figure it out they'll feel like they've been lied to. Do you have any thoughts on that?
CWOL, Sorry about hi-jacking the thread.
Accuray, Yes, I adopted this strategy as well. I made it clear to S11 that it was WW that wanted the D and not me. WW was furious about it, but I told her it's the truth, I don't want to tell him lies. I saw an IC before too and she told me to avoid casting blame, etc. However, I think it is important for S11 to know the truth. My WW was hoping to tell him that it was a "mutual decision" and that mommy and daddy agreed, etc. I would have none of that, especially when it was completely untrue! This was also the methodology from the other website that I was using, which recommended Exposure as well. I also talked to a child therapist and she said not to involve therapists with S11 just yet, the problem exists with the parents and if there are issues with S11, then bring him in. Anyway, just my data points.
Me-LBH, 48 Spouse-WW, 48 Married for 19 years Son, 12 BD #1 - November 1998 (EA 7 months after wedding) BD #2 - November 2015 (same XBF EA) WW filed D February 2016 WW moved out April 2016
