Wife is moving out :(

[DigIt]

Ok, where to start...a little background. I've been with my W for 9 years, 3 of them married. She had a son at a very young age, father is completely out of the picture. I've basically become father to him (he's 18 now, 10 when we met).

Things were going great for a few years, I moved into her condo and slowly stepped up my game as a parent, with her approval. (Didn't want to overstep my boundary so early)

She then decides to go back to school to become a nurse, which I encouraged her to do. I was in school when we met, and that kinda motivated her. She found a work-from-home job to do while she was going to school. This is where I first noticed things.

She was extremely involved with school, and put the marriage on the backburner. I understood, she wanted this. I wanted it for her. But we didn't communicate very well how to balance everything and just kept on as-is. I had some selfish resentment about it, for sure.

So, fast forward, I get a house, she has finished school. She had gotten a nursing job, but kept her other job, which took up a lot of her free time. Now she went back to school. So she's working 2 jobs and in school full time. During this time, I had developed a problem with prescription pain killers. Not directly a result of us, more of a recreational habit that I lost control of. I didn't tell her about it. Felt terrible and also alone. We kept on like this until she brought up her dissatifaction with us.

That's when I came clean and let her know what was going on with me. She had no clue. But damage was done and she wanted a separation. Finacially, it made sense for me to move out. Most of her family is in Europe and mine are in town, so I move into my dads.

During this time, I went thru a lot of soul searching. Did some therapy, I kicked my drug habit, have been working out. She then says she wants a divorce after a couple months, she just feels we have grown apart and there's no coming back for us. Of course I'm crushed, but I deal with it on my own.

Around Xmas time, she decides that divorce is premature, and wants me to move back in. I do and we start trying to re-connect. It seems to be going fine for a month or so, but then she tells me its not working and that she's been trying really hard, but nothing is changing for her. She loves me but is not in love, all that.

So now, she has purchased a condo is moving out. She doesn't bring up divorce, so I'm not entirely sure she's 100%. I've read The Divorce Remedy, and would appreciate any insight or words of encouragement.

As for me, I've taken my life back, I'm focused on me right now. Exercising, going out, always wanted to ride, so I bought a motorcycle. Jus doin' me. Over the last few months, I have noticed a change in myself, and I'm ready to tackle our marriage issues, but right now, she is not.

There's a lot more to it, as I'm sure everyone knows, so if something doesn't make sense, I may have left something out.

Thanks, and great to be here! I'm reading a lot. A lot.