Rouky, You can always have hope that your h will one day wake up. His journey is a long one and no one knows if and when he'll come to the crosswords of whether to wake up on continue to live in the rabbit hole. It's okay to think about him and your marriage because you two had a long marriage and it's difficult to suddenly snap your fingers and it all goes away. However, in time, you'll come to realize that in many ways, this crisis has put you on a path of self discovery as well.
If you feel good about moving the rest of his belongings into the garage, then by all means do so. Make the space yours, as you are the one living there and do not need the constant reminders of him all around you.
I'm glad Reiki helped. You sound much better today and I hope that this feeling of calmness will continue for you in the days ahead.
Rouky, you do not want the old marriage back...you want a new and improved one and that is what everyone who comes here to strive for. You are learning to forgive and also dropping the rope so that you both can move forward on life's path. If going NC as much as possible will help you, then do so.
I think you've come a long way and I'm very proud of you.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
