RD Movin on 13co

[Sotto]

"it did feel nice to know that she has some regrets but it doesn't change what happened....I don't think anything WAS / WW could do anything to return to my life now I do still love her but it's best to move forward"

One of these days I'm going to learn how to do proper quotes on this forum!!

I think we're all agreed she sounds regretful and that's a good thing - part of her journey. And yes, it doesn't change what happened - nothing can change that past of course.

So, you still love your W, you have been M for 25 years and there is nothing she could do to return to your life now?

From an outside POV, I don't think your M is unsalvageable RD. I can see there has been great hurt caused and what I see is a guy who is struggling to truly forgive and also fearful of opening his heart again to his W (or another lucky woman) at this point.

Now all of this is absolutely understandable and I agree that your W may not be in a place where she is truly ready to reconcile (ie: presume the dysfunctional 'we share a bed, but just as friends' R is ongoing with OM just now.) However, she may be moving towards that place and I fear that you will shut a door to that - which is fine if you genuinely don't want it - but not so fine if it's out of fear.

So, would it help to really focus on these areas of true forgiveness (whatever the ultimate outcome) and your own fears of future rejection by a romantic partner?

Is it a bank holiday over there too today RD? I'm taking my car to the garage as my phone unsynced and I can't work the sat nav... ....this new car is way too clever for me!!

Xx