I caught up with most of your thread. You seem like such a sincere, appreciative, and hard working person, and I am so sorry you are going through this.
Something that helped me put things into perspective early in my situation was that I would never ever want to be husband. I would never want to be the one to just neglect kid and walk away the way that he did. I would be ashamed. ( he is now in such a bizarre state of denial) I do not want to be him. I would not want the roles switched. I know that although I was emotional, I was also loyal and committed and willing to try.
Eventually your husband is going to be hit hard with what he did. He will hit rock bottom. in the mean time it sounds like despite the sadness, you are doing beautifully by really appreciating the things you do have. Don't forget all the great things about you! Keep posting about them! Not for nothing, but you already sound like a person only a fool would leave.
