Thx txhubby, I think tonight i hit that "no thanks" place. I am quite impatient but one thing that I will not do is wait for her to change my life.
@dream, i know that you and darknes are against D, this is DB after all. But i truly think that its the only way to make things work for me. I plan on starting things slowly, first getting the house on my name, can take 3 months. then move towards finalisation before the end of the year.
You know my only boundary is cheating, and i cannot wait for it to happen. She might even be doing it right now. So I must believe that she is, so that I can detach properly.
In terms of my goals, i will not lose that focus. As for who cares what she's doing? I care about my son and the life that he will lead living with her. My mother says to not fight over custody so I resign to having him for wknds only, but my mother does think that my WW will give him to me entirely, as her new single life consumes her. I put my cellphone off, so i can't see any messages, or check tracker, or even figure out the time when/if i awake during the night. So that should help me to detach and lose CONTROL! i actually need to do these 5 things everyday. there we go - measurable objectives!
I'm not that anxious, had a 2hr call with my mother, helped get my mind off things, even though we spoke about my plans for all of it.
Going to continue with the threads until i go sleep. Nite all (in my timezone).
Just cos things are going right, doesn't mean that they were always wrong.
