This grieving process is really kicking my ass! Where there was anger and hate, now there is nothing but sorrow and love. To paraphrase an old Mash episode where Hawkeye was talking with an old flame - she broke my legs and I hated her, passionately. But as time passed I got over the hate but not the love...
And that's where I am. I am unable to separate personal feelings from the divorce process and treating it like a business like some on here suggested at one time. And I feel so guilty for filing that it's eating me up like nothing before. I'm glad no one is here to see me now. I made the mistake of looking at old stuff again...
I'm no where near as strong as I thought I was months ago. I guess it's the finality of it all. I'm having way to many dreams about family now. I'm not sure I have the strength in me anymore.
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
