Okay, I think i had a breakthrough about detachment, I've had 3 and a half hours sleep, so know that my mind is most clear.
I do not expect my WW to tell me what to do, where to go, what to eat, who i can have lunch with, how i must do things and when i must be home. SO WHY THE F DO I THINK THAT I CAN DO THOSE THINGS TO HER. She needs to be as autonomous as I am, and I need to detach so that she can get there.
She finally came in at 5-30am, alarm set for 7-50am. Part of detaching is letting the person accept consequences for their actions; so with 2 hours sleep she will be dead at work. But thats her lesson.
The past two nights she experienced the high life of being single and being able to mingle. The next two days she will have to experience the single mom side of it. Each coin has two sides. I need her to experience both sides in order to make up her mind. Although I do know that one can experience the joys of being single, whilst still being faithful within your marriage - we both are doing it right now!
I called her out on the OM, and said that i am fine with a soft kiss goodbye, no tongue (LOL) and a hug but it depends if she's still in contact with OM. She said that she is not and has even deleted his brother from instagram (OM not on social media). Her interactions with me now come so effortlessly, there is no real tension, just my anxiety from the broken trust.
She also sent me those TMs because she was aware that I might worry that she is out so late, so she has said that if i'm out and she's home that I must TM my whereabouts just to put her at ease. She will continue to do the same. She said no to a curfew which i suggested (CONTROL), thankfully.
Long story short - Goal 5 - work on my control issues!
Just cos things are going right, doesn't mean that they were always wrong.
