It was a yellow swallow tail, it was huge. It was so cool my s was teaching me about them.
Thanks for the advise about breathing through it, lately it's almost all I can do sometimes, day to day or minute to minute. I really feel like a maniac at times then snap out of it.
I think I am just going to stay out of things with in laws, it's sad but I think it's a lose lose for me here. I just don't want to come off like an insensitive jerk.
I think w is trying to get me to react the last few days. Tuesday it snowed a lot so I texted her to stop and get the kids snow boots etc. she saw her toll bill on the counter and texted to ask if it was mine. When I told her no she asked why I didn't put it with her mail. I told her I was just going to pay it and she got an attitude about it. I didn't say anything then I got a thank you an hour or so later. I didn't want to say I didn't trust her to pay it which is really why. It also looks like she went through some of my things when she was here but if I say something I know she'll deny it and try to make me out to be the bad guy again. Then tonight I never got a call from the kids so I texted and also asked about this weekend. Again I got a text with attitude, telling me the "kids requested a lights out already but she could have them call anyway real quick." They told me they were watching a movie lol.
Also, in one of her emails that is a couple weeks old she accused me of hurting her relationship with the kids telling me they've been calling her a "bad mommy" since she left and how she had to repair her image with them. I would never say anything remotely like this but of course it's my fault. It couldn't be that she's been out running around every weekend, moving them out, putting their stuff in storage, disrupting their security, etc. Well, when I had the kids last weekend I heard s say it in a baby talk voice (we have trouble with him and now d too talking that way because he is copying a kid at school). I told him not to say that and explained how it hurt her feelings, etc. then tried to talk to him about his feelings and asked if he was having trouble. He replied, she forgot my m&ms. Oh geez, I thought about telling her about him saying this and the baby talk with it as I think he brought it home from school but idk if I should say anything or just keep staying quiet. There's no being rational with her so I probably won't.
