14 days of sheer hell STILL continues

[DDJ]

So i called her and I apologized for my insecurity, I said it was only based on what she said, or better, didn't say.
She did say that she can see that I had the right to be insecure and she is sorry.

I feel better, but know that tonight I had test of detachment and I failed hopelessly. I would have been better had she not said the thing about telling lies. I don't know if I can ever go back to trusting her, I don't think that i can. I know that I need to or it will never work, but it is so difficult.