I guess it's time for a quick update or my thread will drop off the forum.
It's a busy time right now. I'd like to refinance the house, rather than assume the mortgage, before rates start to go up, so for a variety of reasons - I'm trying to get some more major work done around the house so that a refinance appraisal would have the best chance at coming in at a good price. Most of these are sort of hybrid projects - i.e.- the deck needs to be replaced - and I can't handle the carpentry, but I can do the painting etc. Our divorce agreement actually says I should get him off the mortgage "at the earliest time I am able" and doesn't specify a date - but it would be nice to get it done, and get it done in a way that brings me some benefit as well.
And then some stuff has been going on at work. Some co-workers have left, their positions are hard to fill, and so I'm "covering" a lot of extra work. I know the reality is, that if I step up to the plate in a major way, I can probably leverage this into a promotion (which would make my financial situation a lot more comfortable), and I'm trying to pysch myself up to substantially overachieve for a while - but I'm finding it a little difficult to find enough energy - I must be getting older . Coffee can only do so much...
As usual there is still some weirdness with XH. I opened this thread by explaining that he had informed me that he had shut off the internet at his house (thus limiting my possible communication time - even though I rarely write - and it's always strictly kid logistics). It's become clear since then that he had it turned back on - but didn't bother to tell me (so that I could send these kinds of messages in a more timely fashion).
I was reflecting the other day, that he has a weirdly segmented life. He has days that he works (and does nothing at all with the kids), days that he spends with the kids and days that he spends with his girlfriend, and none of the worlds seem to really touch each other. I think that probably works for him - it wouldn't for me.
I had to write him the other day - because D8's swim season is about to start and I need him to help me with the volunteer commitment. Last year I handled it on my own - but I just can't do that again. So - I sent him an explanation of what the volunteer hours are, why they are important (D8 might not get a spot on the team next year if we don't do them) and a proposal that would split the time between us as painlessly as possible and without the need to actually spend any time together. Crickets. I would really like to get to a point when I can just dash off a quick note about these kinds of things - but he seems to take offense at the littlest things - and I feel like I have to wordsmith everything just right - in this case tell him I need help without him being able to point at anything that might be interpreted as my insinuating that he doesn't help enough.
My former FIL was out last week to bring him MIL's old car. She upgrades after three years and decided to give him this one. I confess his good fortune irked me for a day or two - but that car will be much more comfortable and reliable for the girls than his truck - so I got over it. It was nice to see FIL - he came by to inspect my house (he's never seen it), gave me some helpful tips and a pat on the back for doing a good job with it.
. Coffee can only do so much...
