Job, I knew I could count on you to slap me silly!! I know for a fact he has a meeting. That is a definite. The surrounding ideas are all in my head. You are right...I am going to drive myself crazy. I will vent here and to my friend and sister. I did tell my MIL what is happening because she asked because she could tell things were off. She wants to talk to H but the opportunity hasn't happened. My parents know nothing yet. I feel like if the time comes to tell them then that is the line in the sand. They stood by me 10 yrs ago and will not take this lightly at all. I guess right now I am trying to protect my marriage the best I can. I hope this isn't enabling him. Being disinterested in him is the right thing to do...just not my nature. I feel like it could push him closer to OW because I am not asking how his day was or this or that.
LED .... some friendly advice here. This chitty-Sitch can and will consume you if you let it. The problem with focusing on the issue is in part, we focus ... pull out the magnifying glass and the issue becomes bigger ... FOR US. Its all we can think about, talk about, dream about .... what he is doing/where/with who/ all of that is wasted energy by you. This energy is extremely valuable and you need to pull it all in, channel it into what YOU can CONTROL .... yourself. He will do as he will, nothing you can do/say will stop this ... I would STRONGLY advise you only to vent here, not with your friends, family, in-laws as it is not going to help later down the road. Nor is you continuing the "LOOK AT WHAT HE IS DOING" war chants ... he will only blame you for ruined relationships .. or that he is no longer comfortable with these people in his life and burrow deeper in the tunnel. Its not about score, who can get the family on whose side ... it is a crisis and no one but your H can walk it. Let this realls sink in ... you have NO CONTROL over this part of your life and it probably scares you ... let this play out as it will.
Originally Posted By: LED22
I will go to the gym later, take D to swim, enjoy dinner with my kids and then try to relax. My dr gave me a prescription for anxiety meds over a year ago and I have never taken one. If my insides continue I may need too. Again, not a med taker.
Reading what I have ... you may want to take a look at this .. maybe IC ... I know I was not a person who would ever think of IC but it gave me a place to dig deep and vent about the core fears I had .... looking back that was a turning point in my growth.
