Well just found out that part of what played into my wife's BD was D17 (stepdaughter) told her Mom that she didn't know if she could keep her relationship with her mother if she didn't leave the MR
My stepdaughter and I were close for most of the M towards the end it got a little rough as she wanted more independence and I favored more structure in her life. As I mentioned in a over dramatic display she moved her things to my W Sisters house and was living there for a month or so before the separation but now she is bitter and angry with me. I am still close with the two oldest Step Sons but I was crushed to learn this news.
I now know there is really no hope as I would never put myself between her and her children, it not a choice I would ever ask her to make.
