I think young women are attracted to the "bad boy" image, not b/c he is bad or that he does bad things. She is attracted to his sense of being in charge of himself and not submitting to the pressure of someone else. She loves his self-confidence and how he projects that confidence in every fiber of his makeup. She is drawn to him like a magnet b/c he does not take any of her cr@p, won't play her games, and won't be manipulated. To women, it shows he is in charge, and that's a sense of power that females admire.
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Here is my question. She has started her dream job. So for the last few days she has been sharing what has been happening and she loves it. Am I being played? Is she just sharing with me because she is in a good mood. Should I consider this progress? Or is she just using me as some kind of emotional bus stop. Getting on and off whenever she feels like it. I've been trying to listen and validate. But, if this is the wrong approach - it might backfire right?
If she has always shared her excitement with you, then I believe she is doing what feels natural. I wouldn't say you are being played, b/c I do not see it as manipulation. Most women like to verbally share whatever is new and exciting........and you are "there" for her emotional bus stop. (Haven't heard that term, but it is fitting).
I suggest you simply listen, smile, and validate. I do not see this as a step in progress toward the MR, b/c she is just doing what she's always done.......which is talking about herself, except instead of negative talk, it is upbeat, excited talk. Progress in the MR, is when she responds to something you are doing in DBing. Her getting a dream job will not likely solve the issues she has in her heart about the MR. So, have no expectations and read nothing into her emotional "high". Her mood will probably be lighter a few days, and you will enjoy the break in tension. Just accept it for what it is, and read no more into it.
Does this explain the difference from what MWD says about the spouse responding to the LRT?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
