In DR, I think the book is geared to couples who are willing, or at least considering, saving the M. If I remember correctly, MWD tells readers in several places that if infidelity is involved, to start with chapter ten, first. And if the spouse has said they want a D and is unwilling to save the M.....then go to the Last Resort Technique.

The examples in the chapter about goal setting, were couples that were mainly working together to prevent divorce. There was a couple who were S, but no mention of an active A was mentioned.

The topic of waywardness was not in her book. She did write about the WAW, infidelity, and other issues.

If your W is unwilling to act as a team and set joint goals to improve the MR, then you can only set goals about what you can do as an individual, instead of doing it as a couple.

So, looking back at what you want in the MR, you said:

Quote:
1. I want W to move to share the bedroom with me
2. I want her to spend time with me - talking, sharing, planning,
3. I would like us to be able to work together, compromise, share, etc
4. I would like W to make our relationship and family her #1 priority and her interests/Work 2nd
5. I would like us to be a couple do things together, make friends, go to church, etc - Other common interests - business, politics, technology, music, tv, movies, etc
6. I would like to have a physical, affectionate, sexual relationship
7. I would like W to take part in our family activities - sports, church, etc


Considering she is unwilling to work with you, and the two of you do not want the same things, and you can't control her.........what can you do to make this list become a reality?

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!