New to this. Is it really MLC or just an affair?

[Lone77]

Been feeling good this week. H being so horrible to our D last week has helped me out of the rut I was in after his pouring his heart out and crying to me in the few weeks before. I know it sounds crazy, but when he's in the 'monster' mode I don't miss him and don't feel I'm missing out on anything.

He contacted D 4 days after he'd so badly upset her, no apology though, just asking when she's available to see him. She's understandably not bothered currently. She's got a lot of anger and hurt at the minute. I'm trying my best to help her but can't help but feel annoyed at H that he can just shun his responsibility so easily and leave me to deal with it all. It's taking its toll on me so I'm taking 2 days away on my own, catching up with friends so I can focus on me. It's hard getting that balance but I know I'm spreading myself too thinly and I need to look after myself.

H put a social media on yesterday with a picture of a baby and an over the top message wishing her a happy birthday. Totally different to his 'normal' approach. I didn't recognise the child and later discovered it's the OW's friend's baby. He's making a new friend base of 20 somethings and going out of his way too. Pity he didn't think to wish his old best friend (who he's known for 36 years)'s daughter happy 18th 2 weeks ago. This is definitely washing his hands of all his old and loyal friends and finding a brand new bunch. Quite pathetic really and very insensitive for D given how he's treating her. The OW's friend's baby gets a nicer approach than his own D.

Had some movement financially this week, he's eventually sorting out a transfer of ownership of stocks that were solely in his name. Given his spending on the OW this is a comfort to me as I know that mind and D's future will be secure no matter what. There's still lots of other financial stuff to sort such as house etc but even if the worst happens and even if he blew everything I know D and I will be ok. I'm putting us first and have to.

My main issue now is not my own hurt or upset but just frustration at being the one with all of the responsibility while he acts like a 20 year old and also the way he's treating D and lack of involvement with her. I know I can't change either so I just try and switch off as best as I can.