Hi Cubebot, thank you so much for posting, I appreciate as much help and opinions as I can get!
Originally Posted By: cubebot
I agree with Irish. Please don't take this wrong, but I don't think your H has done ANY work. You said,"do these exercise or no more coming to the house". So he did the exercises. He did the minimum required. He needs to do the work, and he hasn't. He just did what you told him to do. I don't know what to tell you to do, but I do feel like he hasn't expressed remorse, guilt, or made an effort on his own to move things forward in the right direction. i DO think he will, but you need to stop enabling him doing the minimum.
You are absolutely right, he hasn't expressed any remorse or guilt and made no effort of his own accord. Just today I thought to myself that given the current situation and my assumption that doing these exercises was with a view to reconciling, you'd think he'd be on his 'best behaviour' when he comes round and be trying to impress. Every day that goes by he is becoming more and more firm with the kids and I find myself sitting with my head in my hands in despair listening to it all. Just like last time I have done all the work to look at myself and my part in the M issues and change myself for the better and he has done nothing except suit himself.
Originally Posted By: cubebot
You are a great person and the point of doing this the right way, is to make it the last time you up in this sitch, not just to fix things for now.
I'm no vet, not by a long shot.
Hmmmm, you're right! I certainly let him back far too easilly last time. He did no work and I let him waltz straight back in. I need to be tougher this time, that's for sure!
