Your motivation lines up with what I purposed in my previous post. I may not have given you that impression, however, we are on the same page.
She will need to be attracted to you, before she starts feeling those "in love" emotions. Most LBH'S think that means to spend time with her and show off his new improvements. However, I do not agree.....based on the mindset of a WW.
The first thing is for her to miss you being around. Having you sitting on ready to do whatever she wants you to do. Having you stop by the store on your way home from work, having you to fix things in the house, having you to watch the kids while she goes out for a while. You were quite convenient for her, but after separation.....things change. This is the time to show her how divorce will look. She needs that reality, in order to shake lose from the fantasy and the fog.
Be sure you look smoking hot whenever there is kid swap. Be positive, appear happy, etc. It's important you not linger. Let her just have a glimpse of you. Trust me, she will notice everything. Right now, your mission is to focus on being unavailable to her, and filling your time with things you have not been able to do in a long time. Find the man you were before M, or become even better.
It will take time for her to be reattracted to you, b/c of her mindset. Don't give up.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
