I would apply the governing rule -- independent of the impact it might have on your wife, what do *you* want, and what can you handle?

If this interaction is likely to make you feel worse afterwards, don't do it.

If this interaction is likely to get your hopes up that things will be better, don't do it.

If you can go into this interaction with no expectations for anything improving AND you want to spend time together as a family, then do it!

Acc

Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced
M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11
Start Reconcile: 8/15/11
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced)
In a New Relationship: 3/2015