Thank you to all that have been so great to me over the past month on my rollercoaster since BD. I have accepted that the D is inevitable and that the only thing my WAS feels now is guilt, not remorse or love. H would sooner file then well... try. My stitch is hopeless as far as R goes, and I find that I keep typing on the forum looking for hope no one seems to see any. I assume he will be filing shortly from his email last week and then it's done.
Although H doesn't care, here I can state one final time. I love him. I miss him. I wish that this wasn't happening. I don't want a divorce. I want to wake up with him next to me. I want him to come home.
I wish you all the best.
Me:33 H:34 T: 3yrs M: 2yrs H depression triggered and we are "unhealthy": 7/15 H wants to "make it work" 12/28 BD: 3/10/16
Sorry to see you leave. I'm in the same boat, but you will find everyone on here has a great shoulder - hell, we are all going through the same thing in one form or another.
The hardest thing to think about, let alone accept, is the fact that they no longer feel the same as us. That is something that is bothering much more than I want to let on.
From reading your situation, I'm not so sure he really is even feeling guilt - it seems more like he doesn't want to be the one who accepts the blame. Maybe he is like my W (I hope not, cause I wouldn't want to wish that on anyone) and has so thoroughly checked out that he really doesn't want to hurt you any more than possible. My W is famous for this - she lets it drag on than cutting it to the quick because she "doesn't like hurting anyone."
You are not alone...
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
