Some other thoughts about my W... She calls herself a free spirit that I guess she feels I have trapped. When she has gone out with friends she has regularly said she goes out to forget who she is, to forget that she is a mother and a wife and just herself. She has, until the last year, never carried a cell phone, she never liked if I tried to contact her when she was out even if it was about the kids. I guess now she has what she wants, the freedom of not being a mother and wife when ever she wants. I guess I've had thoughts today (and I've had them before) that this was maybe destined to happen someday, that family life especially with young children, was in the way of the things she wants to do.
Even when we went out, I mostly felt like a chaperone than a partner. For example, I would want to dance with her and she would move away, maybe I should have seen signs earlier but then we would have a night out where I felt like a couple and it was great. Just the balance was tilted but that was also a fault of mine that I didn't go out and do my own thing. I don't feel I relied on her to have a good time just felt too many times I wasn't out with my partner.
I guess I question now if this 'free spirit' might ever turn back or being a part time parent is actually what she wants and who she is.
I know it doesn't change my direction for myself though.
