I moved out in January, we are officially divorces as of two weeks ago.
1gr8dad -- thank you so much. It's nice to know I'm not alone on here. I will order that book right away. Detaching is so hard. I feel that by detaching, I am "allowing" him to move on and possibly fall in love with someone else - which is the LAST thing I want! I know I'm not in control of him whatsoever, but it just feels like by sitting back doing and saying nothing I'm okay with it all. Make any sense?
Right now, we are not communicating at all. Any texts about our kids go through my mom - she is like our mediator right now. I don't even see him when we swap our kids. This has been set up because he knows it's hard for me to see him (painful and evokes emotion). Should I go back to normal communication about the kids? Meaning not have my mom involved? Maybe what I'm doing still seems like I care too much? Should I be showing him that I can text him/see him without breaking down?
Finally, does "going dark" and Sandi's rules all apply here as well as detaching?
THANK YOU for all the help.
Me 35 H 45 M 12 T 13 S16, S11, D7, D5 IDTB (I dropped the bomb) 9/30/15
