Just having one of those hard days. I poured my heart and soul into this marriage, moved across the Atlantic twice, both times to places I didn't speak the language, for her. Had to fight for jobs for the last 10 years, having to do anything I could get hold of to bring some money in. For the first time in 10 years I had made a big step forward in my career and I get this. W talks about how I don't know what she has sacrificed for me, yet will never answer if you ask what... I have worked myself to exhaustion building a house, and I wasn't worth her removing one person from our life, wasn't worth her organizing one weekend away for us, even when friends suggested they would help her. So much talk of wanting to love me better, of how she will try and do things but so very rarely did.
What I am trying to save here? Tired of being the responsible one and then having it all resented, tired of being the run that stands when all she has done is run, tired of always being the one to change, having to do things because me trying was never enough, so very tired.
Sorry for venting... My head wants to just move on and leave her but with kids I know I can't. My heart, a lot of the time, wants my family back together because I know it could be great.
