W says my touch makes her skin crawl and she is still in contact with OM. However, if I start kissing her every time she gets angry and goes on her rants (and say, "Your feistiness is a real turn-on) THEN--maybe she'll stop. . It's worth a try!
The one other thing I have not tried is leaving. For eight months she has told me that my presence is killing her and making her a bad mother--but she is still standing. I still think patience and unconditional love/kindness still appear to be my best bet--but this is one tough nut to crack. That is, while it may take six weeks of this actvity to break down another spouse--for me, it may take six months.
And a final word to you snoopers--my last backslide/argument was in no small measure related to nagging thinking about OM and seeing his number on our home phone redial. If our M is to heal, there will come a time to address OP's. However, thinking about it (or better said--not accepting that "it is what it is") when our C's state no interest in reconcilaition remains one of the most corrosive acids to properly applying DB principles.
Later dudes, I think I'll join my Church retreat group tonight and refresh the spirit.
