Eddy--I'm so sorry! Here I was blaming you and it was my spandex friend, Seattle, who taunted me and Merrick! Can I please write it off to fatigue? I woke up from a nightmare at 3 am and couldn't get back to sleep, and I need it! Now I look like the wicked witch of the west...
Better get out of my way... my white cane doesn't seem to work so well!
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Betsy you should go take a nap. A nightmare? Did you eat something spicy before settling down?
Merrick you sure do get some offers don't you?
I saw a guy who asked me out on new years today at work.Man I was drunk that night.I noticed he had his fingernails painted black.I asked him about it.He told me it was because he was a witch.I just about cracked up laughing.I remembered posting about my first kiss in the cemetery. I wonder what he would have though of that.To funny.
So how are things in your neck of the woods?Good I hope.If not you can climb a tree.I hear things are going on in them.LOL Maybe build a tree house.
I'm in such a good mood.I hope it is contagious.
Later Friend. Briget
The grass is always greener over the septic tank... Erma Bombeck
Treat hate with Love... DR. Martin Luther King
Well guys, I made a vow that I would not post until the Islanders scored a goal, but then I decided that waiting until next October was not a good idea.
Nothing is really going on here and just I really needed a short break from all this. When W learned the other day that finding a C was no so simple task, she fired off an angry missive to me about why C is crap regarding her feelings and our M. So I'm not going to push the issue any more (of course, she'll then blame me for not getting one--but I get blamed for the sunrise--so who gives a ***).
Eddy-the thought of Va. Beach really intrigues me, but I'm just not ready for it and actually wonder if lonely hearts, alcohol, and hormones could be a toxic mix. Almost as dangerous as Briget in a cemetery !
I hope the folks in Seattle have a great time this weekend. I wish I could join you because Seattle is the place where I had the best salmon I've ever eaten. Plus I need to knock Safeco off my list of visited ballparks (I saw A-Rod and Griffey homer in the KingGarage--I mean Dome)
Quote: actually wonder if lonely hearts, alcohol, and hormones could be a toxic mix.
Just what are you trying to say here Merrick?? I hope it'll be like a sort of seminar for recovering WAS syndrome (if there is such a thing)LOL.
I think you're right not to pursue the C discussion w/her. Maybe you could do some research on Cs yourself and in the event that she does agree to it at some point, you'd have the data available to her. And then, leave it up to her to pursue from that angle-just a thought.
Seems like some of the things you've been professing are sticking w/her. Maybe in some way, it's a cry for "help" w/her C bashing-like she might go and try it but she's not really ready for that "leap of faith"? Kind of like my sitch where my H has finally admitted that he is GLAD we are seeing one but still not sure of the outcome. Tootles.....
I hope you took no offense. The Va. weekend sounds tremndous and many times I've thought about going. With Eddy going--I thought we could really share some war stories and insight.
At the same time, Ii really have no idea how I would react at such an event--especially if I ended up having a few too many (not something I plan--but it happens). Not that we're not all responsible adults--but that I actually might feel a crushing sense of sadness being surrounded by so many caring people, while knowing what awaits me back at home and awaits all us in terms of our families, children, hopes, and dreams.
I recognize this may be overly pessimistic and that I could find the weekend an amazing source of strength, but I just don't feel going is "right". And it would feel weird telling my kids that I'm going away to see people I don't know when W and I are still living together. Maybe you guys can convince me otherwise, but I'm just not there yet.
As for the C, I hear you. My W's ambivalance is raging tornado that touches down on my head all too often. But as they say, I guess ambivalance is good--and I'm also hoping (not too much) that the legal separation decree that W's lawyer presents to her is a mind boggling retreat to financial reality. I also suspect that W is continuing her EA with OM. While there is absolutely nothing I can do about this -- I sincerely believe there will be no progress in our R until this goes away. Oh well. Time to go home to start another weekend.
We are celebrating my grandmother's 100th birthday with W onboard around a family she hates and where warm fuzzies are highly unlikely to be returned to her. God give us peace.
One of my 180s was to find a MC, make an appointment, and invite my W. She actually went with me, complaining all the way there, but has only missed two appointments since we started last July (both after big fights). I really did not expect W to go with me when I made the first appointment, but figured it was worth the investment.
Not that MC has changed anything for us , but W did say at our last MC session that she did feel better after the sessions.
Just thought I'd share how I got W to start MC, I know your sitch is different, but I finally realized that if I believed C would make a difference, and then better be doing more than just hoping W gets C.
Merrick you could always just go by yourself.That way someone is getting some good out of counseling.After all even if your marriage doesn't make it (and it will) you will need counsleing to get over this.I know I will.My marriage counslor told me he wanted to see me alone if my husband wont' come.
Later Friend. Briget
The grass is always greener over the septic tank... Erma Bombeck
Treat hate with Love... DR. Martin Luther King
If I can get W to go to C--I'll do it. C told me that she belives she can do a lot with couple IF the couples want to do the work. So if one of us doesn't want to work--we'll know where we stand.
As for going by myself, I have DB Coach Laurie for that. She has done as much for me as anyone else. My Manhattan priest may be returning next month as well--and God gives me a lot of the balance I need to go forward.
W continues to be one angry woman. Today, I feel like she has been acting like one of the top five a$$holes I have ever met in my life. In addition, when I went to redial a number I had called five minutes earlier, OM's # poppoed up onthe phone. So I realize he's still in the picture at some level. Thus, I also recognize that she is hurting so much deep inside--but she just won't let anyone else help--and only on her terms.
On the real down side, when she went on a tirade at the kids just yelling about how bad her life was--S9 made the crazy sign by circling his finger near his temple. I stopped him--but this is where we are at. On a lighter note, when W yelled at D5, D5 parroted W by saying, "Why are you yelling at me; you just want me to be perfect!" I had to really fight not to burst out laughing.
Tonight, my family had a dinner for my grandmother's 100th birthday. W was good for the first half, but kind of politely sulked in the corner for the last hour. My father thanked W for coming (I had told him that I take one day at a time and expected W to come, but could not be sure). As we left, W ripped into me for what my Dad had said, "Obviously, you told him I wasn't coming so everyone thinks I would not come. Thanks a lot"
I'm either a patient DBer or I'm burning a hole in stomach.
I think you're a patient DBer! And by no means did you offend me about Va. Beach. So, you could possibly be swayed-is that what you're saying????? I'll have to work on some good pointers for that one. I realize that you have family, W, etc... and maybe it's easier for me at this point but I just told my family that I'm gonna away w/friends and left it at that. Nothing furthuer came out yet, still a few weekends away. And as for the not knowing people, just think of it as knowing all of us just not putting faces to names.
Don't you talk to people all the time in your business? And then one day you need to go to a conference somewhere and wa-la, you finally meet those people you've been talking to every day, weekly, whatever. It makes it more personable. That's how I'm taking this weekend. Trust me, I'm a bit skittish but for some reason, I'm overcoming that fear now and starting to get real excited about being away for a few days to relax and enjoy time w/friends...
Well, keep on working on that W of yours and doing what you're doing coz it's picking at her brain but she just can't put the puzzle together yet. Tootles...........
I hope it'll be like a sort of seminar for recovering WAS syndrome (if there is such a thing)LOL.
, but W did say at our last MC session that she did feel better after the sessions.