Wife wants to separate at end of school year

[Bhuda1]

I'm back. I am in a tailspin. No progress in my situation. I need help and guidance. As mentioned, we still live under the same roof, share the same bed. We are cordial but I know I am not divorce busting as well as I should be.

I have not initiated any affection and there has been none in return. I continue to be available to her. I am home when she gets there after work. Mainly because I am done earlier than she is, I prepare supper most nights, prepare the boys lunches for school most mornings. We are stuck in a routine.

I have hired a personal trainer to improve myself. Where I have failed is "Getting a Life" My problem is my circle of friends are busy and we share the same friends. My life has revolved around my family and my wife. I have nowhere to go to get a life.

I make excuses to leave the house just to make it look like I have other things to do. I usually end up at my office wasting time.

I guess as long as we are in the same house, nothing has changed. I have made mistakes and I am paying for them. She has never opened up unless I pry. I refuse to pry anymore. In the past by my trying to pull her closer, I have pushed her away only increasing her resentment towards me. This has stopped.

I am so alone. I thrive off affection. I feel so empty not being able to show her I really care and would do what it takes to save our marriage. Sometimes I notice some sort of sign that she cares, but that fades quickly.

In short I am available to her. She still has all the perks of being married outside of affection. There is no reason for who to realize at this juncture that she may miss being away from me, when I am always around.

I get so mad at her for her lack of acknowledgement of what I do for her and for our children. I do not do things for acknowledgement, I do things for my family because I want the best for them. The feeling of being so unappreciated eats away at me. I cannot stop as I do not want to disrupt the lives of my boys but I also feel like saying enough is enough. Get out of damn house and live your life without me. There is no way I will move out as she wants to separate.

I need guidance.