Getting out of in house S (9)

[vise82]

Hey.

W came back with boys and I made sure I was out. I took the dog to all the dog parks in the area. I just wanted to see where the parks were. Now I have some places to go to GAL. Worked out good as I came back kids were asking where I went. I am sure W was wondering also.

I put S7 to bed and he tells me he went to get measured for his suite for the wedding. he asked me if I was going. The last time I asked W about it months ago, she said she would check with her brother and didn't get back to me.

I told S7 that I was not sure. I didn't get an invite so I am guessing no. That it has to do with me and his mom moving to separate houses and it all part of that.

I said that his mom would know more then me and he can ask her. I thanked him for asking and reassured him that he can ask me or his mom anything like this.

Later he calls up his mom. Before I go to bed I ask her what she said to S7, She said that I was not going because when people are separated they sometimes do stuff together and sometimes they don't do stuff together.

W asked what I said to him

I answered.

She was angry for my answer because it makes her and her family look bad. And that I don't need to give him so much detail

I reply that I did keep it simple, no invite, I can go. She tried to pull me into a argument about it. I just said I agree with you that we need to talk to them in a simple way they understand and left the room.

It hurt hearing that W told S7 that I was not going to wedding as he really wants me to go. W was saying that I put the blame on her. I just said the truth. She doesn't want me telling the truth to him.

I lost a little hope last night. To not be there and with all the photos that will be taken etc. I am willing to let it go. But I also think I want to say to W that I don't want to hear about the wedding that I am not going to. Its like its being pushed in my face.

I have lost a little love for W. Making me more detached. I feel like I want off this ride. To stop fighting for this MR.

I see my Lawyer tomorrow. I am nervous, and sad. I was hurt last night and to the point I was thinking of telling the lawyer to just start the divorce. To let me start it. I really don't feel like waiting for W anymore. This is a feeling and I know it might pass. Maybe not.

I asked W to buy the tickets this morning for the event she couldn't go to and she asks me if its just me and the kids going. WHY ask that? Who does she think is going with me and the kids?

One day at a time.