Eddy, I posted on your thread and I do see some positives. But remember that post from a WAW talking about melting the solid chunk of ice that causes WA in the first place--well we're both looking at iceburgs and have to be a bit more patient.
I may not remember al the details--but here is some more journaling.
W was in somewhat milder mood on Friday morning and we started to have edgy talks on money. Rather than doing a family vacation and sending the kids to camp, W thoug getting a beach hosue for four weeks would offer a better escape for her. She'd take the kids the entire time while I spent long weekends. But the money and plan raised questions as to whether we would get a new above ground pool to replace the old one we torn down last Fall.
I told W that money is no big deal to me right now given where we're headed and the potential atty fees. She asked whether this meant we shouldn't be careful on everything else--like my hockey tickets. I said I thought that was a better use of our money than a lawyer, but also said she was right that I should have discussed it with her first. I also asked if she was ready to start splitting our assets down the middle so that this would no longer be an issue. She really had no answer to that. I concluded that whatver she decided to spend on a beach house was okay with me because I trusted her judgment to make a good decision.
Before going away with S9, however, I thought I'd try some more of the heated blow-dryer on the burg. I went upstairs and told her that I didn't want her to remain upset thinking I had a plan to take away our kids. I said I knew how much she loved and cared about them and can see how upset she is about this issue. She somewhat pleaded that she wants us to be in a better place--and recognized that a D is not good for the kids--but better than where we are now. She then asked aloud whether she was naive. I said I thought she was sincere. At this she started to cry. In bad DBIng form, I said "The other day you said I never say ILY. Well, I do love you, regardless of where we're headed." She then denied ever making the "You never say ILY" comment the other morning. --I should have known better!
As usual, I have no expectations from this. But the doubts in her mind are something to hang onto. It's now eight weeks since I have had my last angry outburst with her and have been as kind as I can be. If I could survive these last eight weeks, I think I can survive a lot more.
