14 days of sheer hell

[DDJ]

I plan to share this perspective with as many people as possible and am even thinking of studying psychology to obtain a real theory. It will make for a great thesis!

My mother has been great support, something i never needed before and never realised i had at my disposal. She couldn't tell me it outright, but she knew that the MF was the real reason my wife wanted a divorce.

I've been reading through other posts, right now, and have picked up that the...

1. S falls in love (or thinks that they do) with OP
2. They feel guilty about those feelings (most act on them)
3. They feel that marriage is then not for them if they're able to love someone else
4. D is the only way out of a marriage
5. BOMB DROP DAY!

You did nothing wrong, lift your head high and be proud of what you did for your relationship. But make them miss what they had. Detach, Detach and Detach some more. I even took my wedding ring off, and only plan to put it on if, and when we renew our vows.

They must see what they will lose, make it real. I told my W, since you are unsure if you want a D, then i will make you sure - and I said that i want a D.

This had an immediate effect. They have lost control of their life, so you need to take that control that they are pushing onto you away. Its not them asking now - Its you.