This forum, Sandi's rules and bizarrely Justin Bieber helped to bring my W back to me. She was distant for a period until I confronted her in February. Then the next day I got the ILYBINILWY. What a roller-coaster! She went to visit a female friend in another city for a wknd, but also a MF for lunch. She did not want me, nor her female friend with for lunch with him, but I could not connect the dots.
She started doing strange things, asking even stranger things, who was this mutant that just wanted a D at all costs? But through deduction, I realized that she was indeed infatuated with this MF. God brought him into our lives for a reason, as he was a devout Christian and turned her away. But how did she get to that point – the W that was looking forward to a 10 year anniversary?
It is human to err, and she had a very long moment of weakness. I’m hoping that counselling (starting next week) will bring out the real reasons.
I realized a few things: I cannot stop my heart from loving her, and this whole debacle actually made me realise how much I do love her. I have no doubt that in a few years time, I may have been the one stating ILYBINILWY. That scares me. She was feeling guilt for allowing someone into our relationship. She could not deal with what she almost did and she felt that the only way to punish herself for what she did was a divorce. She could not see a future with me, not because of me, but because of her.
I even took my wedding ring off, removed her from all social media, even her contact number on my phone. I needed her to realise what she was going to lose, and once she realized that, she would realise that she was in fact in love with me, and that she had been weak and made a mistake.
Obviously, my story is a lucky one, but in most cases, the OP will take advantage. The W had no-one to turn to and was forced to deal with her own issues.
This is day 16 from her return from the city visit and day 1 of our new marriage.
In conclusion, i do not think that a MLC exists, i think that a S has a moment of weakness, doubts their love and then gives into that weakness. Then the only way to deal with the guilt is to get away, move on and "find yourself", because how can someone with so much control over their life, lose it. how can someone do something like that to the person that they love.
i would love to know what your thoughts are on this theory?
Just cos things are going right, doesn't mean that they were always wrong.
